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“Going South”
I know this is no big deal, but it has been getting under my skin. You know how laid-back and relaxed I tend to be. I'm an easy-going guy. But the cumulative effect of years of hearing the slang term “going south” has finally provoked me to take my stand. You know what I mean? “Going south” generally indicates that something is moving into a position of decreased value. For instance, the economy is going south. Or, his reputation is going south. Or her old face lift is going south. Now, I don't plan a big crusade against this phrase but I do want to offer this modest exhortation in behalf of a different view of “going south.”
Here's what going south means to me. If you start out in Louisville, Kentucky, you have the shout, “They're off,” ringing in your ears. The Kentucky Derby in 2009 will be the 139th running of one of the world's great, continuously running sporting events. Even if you don't like mint juleps, wide-brimmed hats and horses, still you've gotta love 75,000 beautiful, fresh-faced women peering through binoculars at the most exciting two minutes in sports. That doesn't even include the 75,000 male spectators watching the run for the roses.
Keep going south and you roll into Nashville, Tennessee where the musicians are tuning up for the next performance of the Grand Ol'Opry. It is the oldest continuous radio broadcast in America. It began in 1925 and quickly became the cathedral church of country music. It is yet another example of things that are old and venerable in the south. Bring your opera glasses if you wish but be prepared to sing along with the stars. You can do that down south if not at the Met.
Hit the road again and before you know it, you'll be in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, home of the Alabama Crimson Tide--maybe the best college football team in the country this year. Go further south to Auburn, Alabama--the “loveliest village on the plains.” Auburn University fans will tell you they are getting rich by catching armadillos, taking them up to Tuscaloosa and selling them as “possum on the half shell.” But that's another story.
Take a southwestern turn and before you cross the Mississippi state line, you will catch a whiff of Cajun cooking and the music of New Orleans. Or go southeasterly through the Florida panhandle, hug the coastline and go right on down to Key West. You will have gone south to the max! And what's not to love about that? Of course, there are other routes for going south. For instance, start in coastal Virginia and soak up loads of colonial history. Descend into the pleasures of the outer banks of North Carolina. Then take a side trip to Hiddenite, North Carolina and search a while for the world's greatest emeralds. On the go again, hop, skip and jump through the sand hills of South Carolina, then the red Georgia clay. Stop for a day of play at Disney World and get a tan in Miami Beach. Before you know it, you will be wastin' away again in Margeritaville. You'll be nibblin' on sponge cake, watching the sun bake, and helpin' Jimmy Buffett, lookin' for his lost shaker of salt. That's a song even the world's worst singer can't resist singing inside the city limits of Key West, Florida.
I could go on and on about the joys of “going south.” Now that the weather's getting cold and the birds are heading south, I think I need to hit the road as well! How 'bout you?
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