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“One-Liners”
My friend, Debi Nelson, sends me lots of cute stuff to tickle my funny bone. Recently she sent some “Christian One-liners.” Some are funny; some are wise; some are cautionary; some are inspiring. Try some of these on for size.
“Don't let your worries get the best of you. Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.” Now, this probably ought to head the list of Jewish one-liners since it refers to the story of the birth of the great Hebrew leader. But Moses belongs to Christians too. He's one of the heroes of the Old Testament. He truly was a basket case at times. Once he killed an Egyptian in a moment of anger. Still he was greatly used as an instrument of God. Moses is a reminder of how flawed people can be tremendous servants of humanity and of God. The Bible is replete with such people.
Here's another one-liner: “Many folks want to serve God. But only as advisers.” An old friend told me once about attending a prayer meeting. He said the participants sat in a circle and they each, in turn, offered a prayer to God. He said by the time it came his turn to pray to God, they had loaded the Divinity with so many requests, directions of things they wanted God to do, and words of advice, he refused to pray. Said, “God already has enough to do. I pass!”
One-liner: “We are called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.” Of course, this refers not to secular life but to spirituality. One of the great temptations for religious folk is to revel in debates about fine points of theological law. It is awfully easy to win a debate and lose the point. And who among us isn't guilty of having been judgmental about people with whom we see things differently? Wouldn't it be nice if religious folk would mostly stick with simply telling others what they have seen and heard from God?
Here's a goodie: “People are funny: they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.” People certainly are funny. We are a bundle of ironies, inconsistencies and contradictions. Where we sit tells us lots about ourselves. It is comforting to know that we are at least on the bus, on the road and in the church!
Here's a word of warning: “Opportunity may only knock once, but temptation bangs on the door forever.” This is only partly true. It is true that temptation is always competing for our attention. It is one of the things that keep life interesting. Temptation is a lot like sports. It helps build character. Here's a word of warning: Don't be a person who can resist anything but temptation! But opportunity happens more often than we think. The big challenge for us is to develop the eyes to see and the ears to hear the opportunities all around us.
One of the enjoyable things about one-liners is that they can encourage us to think of some of our own. Most of us love twists on the familiar and the trite. We love puns and word games. Here is one that spilled out of my brain: Don't let the undertaker get the best and the rest of you. That part of you belongs to God.
Here's another one prompted by my Mother's Day mood: I've seen some ugly babies but never one whose mother and grandmother doesn't love it. Truth is, I've never seen an ugly baby--only beautiful little gifts from God. Speaking of such gifts, Debi Nelson is one of those beautiful servants of God who work at Florence Crittenton Services in Charlotte. That is the organization that assists single mothers with an opportunity for a healthy pregnancy, a healthy baby and a positive life. I love those people. My closing one-liner is one for you: I love you too!
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